The Wisconsin Skier

A—B—C—E—F— G

Alpine Skiing: noun Alpine skiing are those ski sports involving the complete fixation of your foot to the ski or board. Not all downhill skiing is Alpine in nature, as Telemark skiing is done with an unfixed heel. I love watching the Olympic Alpine ski events more than the Nordic ski events!

Après Ski: noun — French Après ski is French for after ski and encompasses all sorts of activities one engages in, after a day on the slopes. Typically Après ski connotes drinks, dinner, and night-clubbing. Après ski I like to stop at the lodge have a few beers, go back to the cabin, cook a good dinner, and watch NCAA hoops.

Backseat: verb To be backseated is to be forced into a backwards off-balance position on your skis, often due to an unexpected bump at high speeds. Often times recoverable.Wow! I did not see that bump and it backseated me!

Bunny Hill: noun A bunny hill is a short and very gently sloped ski run intended for absolute beginner skiers and snowboarders. Bunny hills provide safe places for them to get used to the basics. Not to be confused with Benny Hill the late British comedian. The children are having their first ski lessons on the bunny hill.

Carve: verb Skiers carve to turn. You carve by engaging your ski’s (or board’s) edges into the snow, bending the skis or boards then causes the skis to turn on the radius formed by your skis or board. Carved turns result in little reduction in speed, but carving directly across the fall line (or even up the hill) will cause you to reduce speed. I love carving turns! I feel much more in control even at much higher speeds!

Chairlift: noun Chairlifts are chairs attached by a bar to a cable that is strung up a series of towers to convey skiers and snowboarders from the bottom of the run to the top. Chairlifts are open to the elements and come in a wide variety of configurations capable of carrying anywhere from two to six people. Let’s head down Blunderbuss and then take the triple chair to the top of Bucktail!

Edge: noun Edges are the metal strips fastened to the sides of skis and snowboards. The purpose is to cut into and grip the snow to facilitate turning. It is good practice to sharpen your edges on a regular basis.

Fall Line: noun The fall line is straight down hill, where does the water fall when going downhill? When you ski or board down or close to the fall line you are bound to pick up speed and when you ski or board across the fall line you are bound to lose or just maintain your speed. When I am in the groove I get aggressive and ski close to the fall line!

Fluffencrud: noun Fluffencrud is powder snow that has been skied through extensively and as a result forms a bumps and piles of soft snow. The bumps and piles are not yet hard and do not push back when you ski or board on them. Skiing in untracked powder is the best, but skiing in the fluffencrud can be very fun!

Gaper: pejorative — noun A gaper is a skier who sets himself very much at odds with the crowd, usually with their cluelessness. Typical gaper symptoms include out of date outerwear, inartful tucks, and all around clumsiness on the slopes. Do you see that Gaper? The way he tucks makes his poles look like a pair of cell phone towers (I hope you were not expecting “looks like lightning very very frightening”, good, that has been done too many times)!